The First Time I Was Hit in Ballet

by | Jul 30, 2025 | Dance Journey, Dance Psychology

Reflections on Toxic Dance Culture

Content Warning: This article discusses childhood experiences of being hit in a ballet class.

I was six years old the first time I was hit in a ballet class.
It wasn’t a slap you’d see in a movie—quick, dramatic, and loud. It was smaller, sharper, and quieter. But it landed with a force that went far beyond my little body.

For years, I carried that moment with me, silently. Like many young dancers, I thought this was just “part of ballet.” After all, the teacher was respected. The studio had prestige. And I was constantly told I was “special” and “talented.”

What I didn’t understand then—but can see now—is that compliments can be used as control. That being called “special” isn’t always about nurturing; sometimes, it’s about compliance.

How Toxic Cultures Take Root

Moments like this rarely happen in isolation. They exist in systems—classrooms, studios, and companies where power goes unquestioned, and silence is expected.

These environments often thrive on:

  • Misplaced loyalty – Students and families stay quiet to protect the teacher or the studio’s reputation.

  • Manipulation through praise – Dancers are told they’re gifted, but that gift comes with strings attached: obedience, silence, and self-sacrifice.

  • Cultural conditioning – “That’s just how it’s always been” becomes a shield for harmful practices.

I now know the difference between a tough day and a toxic system. A tough day challenges you to grow; a toxic system chips away at your sense of self.

Breaking the Silence

Sharing this story isn’t about shaming one teacher or one studio—it’s about opening a conversation. Because so many dancers have similar stories. Stories of moments they felt unsafe, disrespected, or humiliated, yet said nothing out of fear or loyalty.

To dancers, parents, and teachers reading this:

  • Trust your instincts. If something feels off, it probably is.

  • Recognize red flags. Body shaming, public humiliation, or physical discipline are not acceptable.

  • Prioritize well-being over prestige. No opportunity is worth long-term harm.

A Healthier Future for Dance

The dance industry can do better. By acknowledging the harm of old-school, abusive methods, we create space for studios built on respect, safety, and joy.

If we want dancers to thrive—not just survive—we must lead with compassion, self-awareness, and the courage to break generational cycles of harm.

Listen to the Full Reflection

I share this story in more depth on my solo episode of the Dance Real Podcast:

🎧 Listen: “The First Time I Was Hit in Ballet”

It’s a short but powerful conversation for anyone who loves dance and wants a safer, more supportive industry for the next generation.

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